What should I do in life?

Ali H. Baloch ‏@alihb12: I don’t know what to do in life and over what i am good. I lose interest in whatever i do after some time. can you help me find?

ANSWER:

Ali, It’s a horrible thing and I know how you feel. Not the feeling of “I don’t know what to do” but the feeling of “I feel bad that I don’t know what to do”.

When I was 18 I wanted to be a psychologist. Then I wanted to be an academic in computer science. Then I wanted to be a novelist. I felt the only way girls would like me is if I wrote a novel that was successful. I would pass a pretty girl on the street and I would think, “she won’t like me until I publish a novel”.

Then I wanted to be have my own TV show. Then I wanted to be a millionaire. Then… You get the picture. Every few years things changed.

My ten year old daughter said to me yesterday, “I don’t even know yet what I want to do when I grow up.” I told her, “That’s funny because I’m 44 and I don’t know what I want to do when I grow up either.” And she laughed and said, “what do you mean? You’re a grownup!”. Little kids sometimes think they know more about what “grownup” means than grownups do.

We’re all given this very deep impression when we are young that by the time we are “grown up” that everything needs to be settled. We need to have a stable financial life, a spouse, children, upward mobility, a career that moves from success to success. We need to be an aquanaut or an astronaut or a politician or a lawyer or something!

But that rarely happens. Even now I’m trying to figure out what to do next. I switched careers a few years ago and decided to focus on writing and investing. At some point I will switch careers again. Not because I am interested in anything else but it’s because it’s what I’ve done all my life and I finally can’t fight it anymore. In fact, I’m excited to see what I come up with that will hold my attention for more than a few weeks.

So I’m envious of you. You have an extra decade or so on me where you can continue to discover things you are interested in. You can continue to meander and pick up things along the way, the things that will add up to a great “you”. It’s like a magnet on the beach, picking up all the stray pieces of metal. Who knows what you will find! Maybe some gold (do magnets pick up gold? I don’t even know).

Enjoy the meanderings, the soul searching, the loves lost, the time wasted. All of it will add up to a complex and very unique “you”. The more you appreciate RIGHT NOW the more the future will become a fantastic reality. Dont pressure yourself to be in the future

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